I have spent the last few months…prioritizing.
Weeding out.
Facing realities.
And now, on a Sunday night with my kids playing happily in the back and Breaking Bad on my television, I have realized.
Things are good and I am happy.
Recent circumstances have made me face some startling facts.
Unnerving facts.
Like the fact that I’m a damn grown up. I’m a grown up and while that does mean that I can eat cookies for breakfast and swear in my blog, it also means that I have to deal with some very grown up shit.
Like the fact that the people I always expected to be in my corner might not be. At all. And as a matter of fact might not have even thought of being in my corner for a long damn time.
I’ve said goodbye to a lot of childish notions. Notions of friendships that last lifetimes and notions of people I love being invincible.
But in saying goodbye, I’ve gained…so much. I’ve realized that there are people who love me. That my happiness is not conditional on other people.
That I can hang on to what I have, and fight for the pleasure of treasuring it.
That my life will be a beautiful piece of art, and that I can craft it however I want.
It’s refreshing.
It’s freeing.
It’s badass. And I know now, more than ever…that I am living the perfect life for me. And I am grateful.