An open letter to my two oldest children

Oh, you two.

Really, what is there to say?

I realized this weekend how quickly you’re growing and somehow I feel like I’ve missed out on a huge chunk of everything.

I haven’t, though. I know that.

But it feels that way.

You’re both so amazing. The things you say and do. You’re so much more than just kids, and honestly I have a hard time believing I had anything to do with bringing the two of you into the world.

I feel like I haven’t been a great mom. We don’t have round the table family dinners and you don’t come home to milk and cookies. I don’t spend time in your classrooms and I have a hard time keeping track of your teachers’ names sometimes.

But I guarantee there isn’t a kid alive who is more loved than you are.

I wish so much for you both. I know it seems like so much is expected of you both…

It is.

I’ve always said I don’t understand when parents live vicariously through their children, but now I kind of do. Not in the way you’d think, though. I don’t want you to write novels and act in plays or be the brilliant I couldn’t be.

I want you to love, fully and completely, and be loved back just as much.
I want you to laugh, every day, for the rest of your life.
I want you to be who you are and know from the very start that there will always be people who don’t understand you or just plain don’t like you. And I want you to be you anyway.
I want you to learn that saying you’re sorry is one of the most important things in the world. People who don’t accept it have their own problems.
I want you to never be afraid of taking a risk to achieve a dream.
I want you to never have to look back and wonder.

So when it seems like we are tough on you or we expect too much, know that if we do it’s only because we want you to get everything you can out of your life.

I love you. I love you both. You are everything in this world that makes me happy. I am so lucky that I can’t say it enough. I love you I love you I love you.

Love, Mom

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